The other night, God came to visit me. For a little chat. He does it from time to time. It seems that since I'm older, I am more confident. Already we wear beards both. Casually it approaches these things, you know. He even tu me. What I am obviously not in spite of the familiarity between us.
But that night, it was red with anger. He had read my blog and all these falsehoods I shed on his account and religions. He called me all the words, I was advised to read the Bible and even threatened me with a fatwa to make myself feel that He was the God of all men. But it has scanned my brain and saw that it was in the writings of Hubert Reeves, Trinh Xuan Thuan, Spinoza, Stephen Hawking, Einstein, this bad joker Pierre Yves Morvan and even Peter Teilhard de Chardin and a bunch of other scholars that I drew all my deviations.
At this point in his vituperation, I examined his head and could not stop a tear running down my cheeks.
Then He stopped to speak plainly and His wrath has fallen. Good God is merciful, it is known. But I felt His alternating anger and mercy had deeper roots.
I looked up and noticed that he suddenly showed a dark mine. Respectfully, I raised an eyebrow questioningly towards him. It took a while to answer me.
"Listen," he said, I read what you call your anchors.
I ducked into the shoulders, expecting another volley of insults and threats.
"No, no," he said, fear not. I'm looking for is mine, my own anchors I mean .* When I look at what people say or write me, it gets very mixed, you know. Sometimes, I am an all-powerful character who rules the heavens and on earth, now a being of goodness that does not allow a single hair falls from the heads of men that I do not allow this, sometimes a ** vengeful God like Sodom and Gomorrah, sometimes as a tyrant who drove Adam and Eve from paradise to a misdemeanor, now a ruthless father who sends his son to the crucifixion, now a god ethereal which is said "he is the one" ... well now I am confused myself. Some even say that I am an immanent God, a God entangled in nature, the cosmos and I are one. Freud told me - well, yes, it is in my paradise despite everything, moron - so he told me I was suffering from multiple personality syndrome. And now with the story of God immanent, now I'm not even a person. I would not have multiple personalities, I would not have even one. It's very hard to be God, you know, "he finished, Air depressed.
What I could answer that, eh? I still could not advise him to consult another psychologist or St. Augustine or Thomas Aquinas or some other luminary sitting up there beside him. It would no doubt even more mixed.
So I said nothing at all and, after a long silence, he put me on the shoulder a compassionate hand and then he leaned toward me and, after looking left and right to be sure we did not hear, he whispered in her ear: "Listen, I too read these wicked writings you speak in your blog. I even read this recent publication "Happy without God" and since I do not sleep anymore because I do not know if really exist. "
With these words of consolation, he gave me a wink and gave me an affectionate shove. Then he turned and left.
I am sure you will agree with me now that God is really a good fellow.
* The reader will note that I use the upper case when I talk about God. But from His side, He does not use capital letters when He speaks of Himself. Conversations with God requires a lot of subtleties.
** At this point, I almost said that he had missed the Rwanda genocide where the hair on the heads remained but that, cons, who were the heads fell.
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